Presents Vs. Presence

A fellow dad communicated to me his insecurity over not being able to afford a present for his 1 year-old daughter's birthday. It was really weighing heavily on him and causing him to have a lot of negative feelings about himself and his value and worth as a parent.

So I was like, dude. Just put it on the credit card and pay it off later. It's the American way! Are you American or are you a pinko commie? Do you want your daughter to grow up in a world without American Girl crap? Do you want all the other 1 year-olds to point and laugh at her? Suck it up and charge it, buddy!

OK. Not really. But it's silly, right?

Kids don't give a crap about presents - especially 1 year-olds. They want your PRESENCE, not your PRESENTS. They want their parents to be there for them, not a bunch of crap to play with.

My experience so far is that kids can play with ANYTHING. I'd say that about 80% of the time I spend with my daughter consists of going outside and exploring. Watching squirrels. Picking up rocks. Climbing stairs. Chasing the cat. Last weekend we found a patch of dirt and gravel and she spent at least a half hour running back and forth on it, sticking her hands in it, digging, and rolling around in it. She couldn't have been happier.

She spends about 5% of our time together playing with "toys".

Her only expectation is that when she says "Papa up", I pick her up. And I'm always happy to oblige.

So don't worry about how much money you spend on your little ones. They don't really care as long as you're present with them.

And that's One To Grow On.

xo
-t.