All Aboard!

Children's programing is tripping me out. Seriously. My daughter is obsessed with Dinosaur Train. Last night as I sat with my wife, I can hear my daughter speaking in her sleep. "Dinosaur Train."
What the hell is going on? I don't even like her watching T.V. but after awhile you get broken down. Straight up Git-mo Bay style. My wife looks like she's just done 15 rounds with a young hard hitting George Forman, and I have my head so far up my own ass, I am useless. So the T.V. finally comes on (if I am lucky, there's a break smack in the middle of the Dinosaur Train, at 15 minutes, where I turn it off.) Tonight, was really cool though, we sat in the recliner, my daughter with her "cow milk"(she's knows the difference and likes to show off that she knows), me with my loud brain screaming "you better make more money or you're all going to die", and we watched as the dinosaurs stomped around with their feet. "I am mad" the green bird says, "I stomp because it's fun" says the purple little meat eater. There we were, two peas in a pod and at the 15 minute mark, BAMM! OFF went the T.V. I thought I was slick, making sure I can regulate while I am still bigger than her...My daughter put up a bit of a fuss, looking up as if to say, "Are you f-in serious man, I know there's 15 more minutes of this thing, I maybe small, but I am not as stupid as you dad. This is MY show! Gimme break" but then, afterwards, she decided to dismount off the recliner, and show me how she too can stomp around. I joined her, we smiled, the house shaking, was it dancing? Hell, if I know, I don't really care, it was fun. It was a moment where we were just hanging... Doing our thing. Later, as I was getting my keys, she looked at me, and said: "bye dad." She knows my routine, she watches me like an undercover cop on a stake out. Dismissing me, to move back to my wife. I am not into the downloading heat waves off the flat screen and the possible warp of the brain it puts on all of us, especially her little head, but if she likes it, she likes it. I can allow some time, some escape from the norm, it's not like she's watching mixed marital arts or better yet horror flicks. It's some dinosaurs for crying out loud, and for the most part they resolve conflict fast... All aboard!!!
-J

Conflicted

My wife and my daughter and I "co-sleep". Let the judging begin. No we are not hippies, no we don't believe in the cry it out method, yes we have read every frickin book out there, we just made the decision and have been sticking it out, and YES, it's gnarly on the relationship and we probably are totally fucking up our kid, but hey, give us a break, and give me a break, like I have a choice, I don't have the BOOB. It's been 22 months and tonight as I work my horrible overnight shift that doesn't pay the bills and keeps me at a low grade terror hum, I received the text... they both laid down in my child's room on a little thin mattress, and yes... wait for it... she's sleeping there by herself, not my wife, she's pacing the grounds, my daughter is sound asleep. This was after she stated she must have a snack and use the potty mind you, again not my wife, my daughter said this to my wife. She also chose to walk back into her room in which she has never before used as a resting spot.

I am not sure if we are excited to have our own bed back? Or if we are duly distraught not to have "the missing link of the trinity/entity" occupying our love nest? I will find out tomorrow as I slip into bed after work for that one hour we are all together, will my daughter be there (I secretly hope so and kind of hope not) or will my wife be ALONE, (cue 70s funk music in the background, "I'm here to deliver the pizza".) Either way its yet another transition in the never ending saga of being a new dad. I love both my girls, my wife and my daughter, and although the lack of physical gymnastics has taken its toll on my wife and I by having our daughter rule the roost, she's only going to be so willing to sleep in our bed for so long, I was getting used to it, and enjoying the moment, enjoying the bonding we are grateful to be present for. Look, I'm sure I will get over it, I mean I need to be of service to my wife for crying out loud but I remain.... "Conflicted".

-J

Counting and Melting Hearts

Last night I heard my 18-month old daughter count to 10 for the first time. She's a genius. OK, so she skipped from 6 to 10, but still. She just jumped from not counting at all to counting to 10. I'm no expert, but I think that's pretty impressive. She grabbed a box of manila envelopes and dumped them on the floor, then picked them up and started counting. She's partial to the numbers 1 and 2, of course, and repeats those ones over and over while she holds up her index finger. Her fingers aren't sophisticated enough, yet, to show me all the numbers she's counting, so I count by holding up my various fingers while she holds up her single finger. Last night I followed her lead and we counted together. She would get to 6 and then say "ten, yay!"

Even more amazing is that when I got home from work and sat down next to her on her miniature Pooh couch she grabbed my thumb and started pulling me around the house. Running to the window. Running through the kitchen. Running to the blow-up mattress on the floor. Running back to the couch. Sitting down. Getting back up and running around again. Both of us laughing the whole time. It was amazing. That's the first time she's actively pulled me around as if to say "Daddy, I want to show you something. Come on!"

The thing that makes it particularly touching for me is that I just got back from a 4-day business trip and had a lot of fear about how she would react to me being gone that long. Would she be sad? Would she be angry? Would she be distant when I returned? It's the first time I've been away from her for so long. I talked to her everyday on the phone, but I know that a 10-minute phone call just isn't the same as in-person one-on-one time. So when she grabbed my thumb and pulled me around the house, it just affirmed that our strong bond was still intact and that nothing had changed.

I was still her Papa and she was still my little Buggy Bear.

-t.

The New Dad Diet

Just like moms, most new dads gain weight before/after the baby is born. Well, for those of you who are insecure about it, don't fret because the New Dad Diet is here. And the best part is that you don't have to do anything!

Our baby is now over 1 year old (yay, we made it!) and she's not only eating solid food but she only wants to eat what daddy is eating. So I've found that what happens is that as soon as I start eating, she reaches out to get my food. Inevitably (because everyone knows I'm a pushover when it comes to my daughter), I end up feeding her my food while I'm eating it. This ends up cutting my portions in half. And everyone knows that when you reduce the portions, you lose the weight. I'm still waiting for the extra pounds to drop off, but I'm sure it'll start happening any day now...

So try the New Dad Diet and let me know how it works for you!

("The New Dad Diet" is a Trademark of Two New Dads, Incorporated. All Rights Reserved.)

xo
-t.

Learning Vs. Frustration

Our daughter is right on the verge of walking (yay!) which means she's standing on her own, pulling herself up and pushing things around. She loves to grab certain things and push them around the house. Although sometimes she gets frustrated because she'll run into a wall or the couch and it stops her forward progress. She doesn't understand that she can't just keep pushing it right through the wall and she hasn't figured out that it's more effective to just turn around and go the other way.

So this morning she was pushing the laundry basket and was getting frustrated that she couldn't push it through the hallway because she wanted to push it through at an angle that didn't quite work. She kept getting stuck. Mom shifted the angle of the basket so that our daughter could push it through, but she insisted on pushing it HER way and the basket kept getting stuck. This lead to frustration and crying. Mom wanted to keep adjusting the basket until our daughter figured it out. I scooped up our daughter and comforted her so that she would stop crying (which, of course, she did).

Mommy's argument was that she needs to keep trying until she learns, even if she gets frustrated in the process. Daddy's argument was that there's value in teaching our daughter to take a break from something if it's getting too frustrating. This is something I've had to learn over the years: If you leave something alone and come back to it with fresh eyes, often you'll have a different perspective and it's more effective than trying to plow through something that's not working.

Anyone have any thoughts on this? Input is more than welcome...

Thanks!
-t.

Bonus Episode #1: Sex!

The last two episodes of Two New Dads (Year One) are bonus episodes that we weren't originally planning to launch, but people told us they were just too funny to keep to ourselves. So check out Bonus Ep. #1: "Sex", now online:

Good Example of Hypnosis Birthing

Episode 17: Hypnosis

Only two more episodes of Two New Dads left in Year One!!

Check out the latest episode: Hypnosis.

http://www.blip.tv/file/3698023

Ever wonder how to hypnotize your baby? Well keep wondering because that's not what this episode is about. [fart]

Three Is a Magic Number

I thought some people might find this helpful: Whenever our baby was fussy and we couldn't get her to calm down, we would put on the old 70s Schoolhouse Rock video "Three Is a Magic Number" and our baby would calm down INSTANTLY.  I have no idea why and I have no idea whether or not other parents have had the same experience but I swear it works every time.  I've tried other Schoolhouse Rock videos and nothing works like "Three Is a Magic Number".  So try it out and let me know if it works for you.  Or if there are any other magic bullet songs/videos that calm your baby down, I'd love to hear about those, too.  Thanks!  Here's the link to the YouTube version of "Three Is a Magic Number": http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mxmKRyLdBho


Enjoy!


-t.


PS - After a brief hiatus to attend the Florida Film Festival, we're back with the final episodes of Two New Dads, Season 1.

Pack 'N Go!

Getting cabin fever from being at home with the baby too long?  Get the hell outta there!  But there are a few things you should know before you leave... Check out the latest episode of Two New Dads: Pack 'N Go
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UD_1NIzhJ88

Colds Companion

As a companion piece to this week's episode "Baby Colds", I found out last week that my daughter has Bronchitis.  Scary.  I won't get into the debate between my wife and I about whether or not it was teething/weather change/cold, I'll just say this: DO NOT TAKE COLDS LIGHTLY!  Our daughter was sick for about 2 weeks before her wet cough got bad enough to keep her (and us) awake at night.  After two nights of dramatic coughing fits and a low fever, I finally took her to the doctor who diagnosed her with Bronchitis and prescribed antibiotics and suggested Pedialyte which is meant to keep her hydrated and help get rid of the chest congestion.  (It's like heavy-duty Gatorade for babies.)  The danger, the pediatrician explained, is that Bronchitis can easily turn into pneumonia which can then cause permanent respiratory problems.  Like I said: Scary.  She's a little better now, although not out of the woods completely.  She had a coughing fit early this morning which worried me and prompted me to call the doctor again who advised me to see how tonight goes.

The thing that scares me is that she's teething now, too, and the symptoms of teething are similar to the symptoms of a cold.  It's tempting to be dismissive about it (especially when you have a spouse that reinforces this attitude).  Luckily I got her to the doctor in time and she will hopefully be 100% in the next day or so.  But this experience has taught me to stick to my guns and err on the side of caution rather than have a daughter fighting off pneumonia.

A few other things this experience has taught me: If your baby gets a cold, keep her hydrated and take her to the doctor.  If she has a coughing fit, cup your hand and pat her back to loosen the phlegm.  It's OK if she swallows the phlegm because then it's going into her stomach and no longer in her chest/lungs.

By the way: Did you know Pedialyte is only good for 48 hours after opening?  Even if it's refridgerated.  What's up with that?

-t.

Good Parenting

My baby and I went to our neighbor's house for some play time on Saturday night and I witnessed something amazing...

My neighbor's 5 year-old boy was upset because his 1 year-old sister broke a beautiful, dead monarch butterfly that he had found and kept in a little tin can.  The 5 year-old was clearly distraught, but didn't show it in the typical 5 year-old way (crying, screaming, hitting, throwing a tantrum, etc.).  Even though he was crying, he was still able to tell his dad that he was angry.  "Dad, I'm angry with her, she broke my butterfly!"

The dad first confessed that he had known about the broken monarch and apologized to his son for not telling him sooner.  Then the son said that he was mad at his dad, too.  Then he threw something.  The amazing part was that the dad explained calmly that it was OK for him to be angry and upset, but it wasn't OK to throw things.  The boy stomped out of the room angrily, only to return a couple of minutes later to apologize for throwing things.  The dad apologized again for not telling the son sooner about the butterfly and said he would do what he could to help him find another one.  He then told his son he was proud of him for being able to express his feelings so well.  The boy was able to cry it out in the safety of his dad's arms and get through it without having to stiffle his feelings and without having to feel shameful or guilty about his anger or how he expressed it.  He wasn't told to "suck it up" or that "big boys don't cry" or any of the other old-school cliches that many of us heard growing up that were designed to invalidate our feelings.

Wow.

I know it seems like I'm making this up, but it's true.  I hope I can remember this as I raise my own child and I hope my child feels safe enough to express her anger in a healthy, positive way.  And if she doesn't, I hope I'm able to set healthy boundaries with her when she acts inappropriately. 

Good parenting is in session, people, and it's inspiring.  Thanks neighbor!
-t.

Boy, Girl or Hermaphrodite?

Check out Two New Dads, Episode 10: Boy or Girl?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HFmmaT9yehE

Daylight Savings Challenges

For some reason, ever since Daylight Savings Time, our baby's sleep schedule has shifted, making it tough on mommy and daddy.  She used to nurse and go to bed between 7:30 and 8pm.  This has been pretty consistent up until now.  As of this week, she goes to sleep at about the same time, then wakes up about 1/2-hour later and is WIDE awake and wants to crawl around everywhere.  At about 9:30 or 10pm she starts to get tired again and has a hard time going to sleep without taking a bottle.  What's up with that?  So I give her a bottle and she goes back to sleep.

I'm normally a go-with-the-flow kind of guy and can adjust to whatever the baby needs, but I'm having a really hard time with this.  On the one hand it's good because I'm the one who stays up with her while mommy sleeps and I get to spend a few more hours a day with her, which I've been missing since I went back to work.  The downside is that I'm used to having that time to myself to chill after work, then to work on my personal projects.  Now that time is pretty much gone.  Anyone have any suggestions?

She's 10 1/2 months now.

Thanks!
-t.

Forgetful Posts

I keep forgetting to update our blog with crazy zanny new insights. Well, the first b-day has come and gone, and yes it was stressful but awesome. Family and friends came out to show some love and the day was very cool. T and his family came too, and thats awesome because we don't get to hang nearly enough these days. We still have a few espisodes in season 1 and then on to filming season two... DUH DUH DUH duuuuuhhhhh..... -J

Freaky???? Episode 9

http://www.youtube.com/user/twonewdads#p/u/0/3NjyF1Ypn6Q

Milking Your Partner

I'm sorry, did you say "Milking Your Partner"?
Yes, I did.  It's the title of the new episode of Two New Dads. Check it out:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kwl4NaReBiw

Dirty Diapers

The latest episode of Two New Dads launched this morning: Dirty Diapers.  Check it out.  But don't get any on ya.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q29I0x9jI00

Crawling and Standing and Hugging, Oh My!

So I got a great Valentine's Day gift from my daughter this year: She started crawling!  And a few days later she was playing in her crib and standing up all by herself (supporting herself by grabbing onto the side, of course, but still...)  Huge milestones!  It seems that the milestones are coming fast and furious now and I'm just greatful that - even though I'm back at work semi-full-time - I've been there for all of them.  She's started voluntarily hugging me, too, which of course is the best feeling in the world.  One thing I wanted to address that I've been hearing from people re: crawling is that I'm now supposed to be all panicked and paranoid about having the house babyproofed.  My response to this is Yes and No.  Yes, of course we have to be careful about what she does now that she's tearing around on all-fours.  But, no, there's no reason to panic.  I feel like my wife and I have always been mindful of watching her, so it's not like we have to start doing anything drastically different.  We put plastic plugs in all of the electrical outlets which took all of 2 minutes.  We put a plastic latch on the cupboard with the dangerous chemicals which took all of 2 seconds.  And when the baby starts crawling toward the tangle of wires next to my computer, I throw some safe (unplugged) decoy wires down in front of her and she seems content to play with those for now.  No problem.  The one major concern I have is when she climbs up on our low window sill with the chipping white paint which she could easily mistake for food.  The solution: Watch her like a hawk when she climbs on it and when she claws at it, chipping at the paint, take all the little pieces away before she can put them in her mouth.  Not the best long-term solution of course, but for now it works.  So, we're just enjoying the milestones and the immense adorability of her little body waddling all over the place and not freaking out about creating the "perfect" babyproof environment for her to survive in.  xo -t.

"WARNING: Do not vaccinate your baby until you've watched this video:

BEWARE: controversial and provocative: share with parents around the world.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-auCdbFYUHU"

Checking in and rambling...

It's tough going out and having a family member with the baby...I mean we need this free time and it was for our good friend's b-day. But we got home and my mom was saying the baby was fussy and crying (of course she made it sound much more dramatic) but my wife and I felt guilty. Now some other parents we know literally can put their kids in bed, and they go right to sleep, but really our baby dictates her own schedule and although I am cool with my wife's hippie style alternative loving approach, I sometimes wonder if a schedule would be better for the baby providing structure and such.  Yet in my heart of hearts, I also feel (and this is just for our situation, I really don't have a "judgement" on how other people operate)  that it could be a selfish just because it's inconvenient for us sometimes. When I get relaxed it feels right thus far, but as most of you know I am not a great sleeper since long before the baby, and now the baby is almost a year old and I am walking around in a haze, granted part of that is because I am out of work and the days bleed into each other and the nights blur just as much. SO here I am at 130am. watching the winter olympics, feeling like a cold is coming on, trying to gear up for a birthday party soon for a one year old (which by the way is not going to be all crazy a. because we just think thats a bit much, we aren't into that crazy material stuff, and b. because even if we were we can't afford the crazy stuff, like having homie the clown, cirque de souel, and a re-enactment of Andy Warhol's factory with Velvet Underground tribute band actors all in the background being sheik just for the guests, even if we could afford the crazy stuff I think it would still be a mellow affair that celebrates the joy and wonder of the baby not the joy and wonder of what guest may or may not think of the festivities. So you guessed it, cost-co pizza- some pop, and some cake, some balloons and friends and family... three hour time window, and wa la... My wife is much more of the social party planner, but we are trying to really be present and conscious now around special occasions, which is why when we married we both said okay lets go easy on the Valentines and all the trippy hallmark holidays, and be sure to celebrate their spirits as much as we can, not necessarily traditionally and on the days the corporations have designated...I am rambling, but I haven't written in a few days because I have been trying so hard to find work I forgot about just checking in and enjoying the process.

J

Two New Teeth!!

First of all, thanks to everyone who gave me tips on teething through our Facebook page and Twitter.  For those of you who weren't aware, there was a mysterious slit in my babies gums last week.  It almost looked like a canker sore on the top of her gums, in the front.  A lot of people told me it sounded like teething.  Sure enough, a couple of days later, two tiny teeth popped up from her bottom gums.  And of course I responded like I've been responding to every milestone in my baby's development: with wonder and awe.  Now that the wonder and awe have worn off, I'm a little sad because it's the beginning of the end of that amazing gummy smile.  You dads know exactly what I'm talking about.  She'll never have that gummy smile again.
-t.
(aka Proud-But-Sad Dad)

Sitting With Her.

She's just really funny. The best decision I ever made was to marry my wife. Not only is she really nice, pretty, and caring. She's also FUNNY. So we are watching the Grammy's late, because the baby tends to take her time while co-sleeping and now that she's moving around we have to watch that monitor closely because the bed is very high off the ground. So my wife puts pillows up everywhere as a makeshift barricade. (This will not be working for much longer). We are in a frantic - get the house ready - baby proof extravaganza- meltdown. Not to fear, I will take it one room at a time, and start with the PLUGS. Then slowly work my way to the fireplace and the corners of things... I suggested we just give the baby a helmet and letter go hog wild, but my wife thinks that will give her a complex. Personally I think it will give her the confidence to head butt. I digress. So my wife is the funny one. We are watching the grammy's and I can't even repeat the jokes, but she had me laughing. We thought to ourselves how bizarre these awards shows are, considering the nation is plunged into debt, we are out of work, trillions of dollars are spent on war, but these performers are getting all strange loving up on eachother with uddles of cash, it was odd. Granted, we enjoyed PINK, (I can't believe I just copped to that) but we just were saying how these show's should be private for the stars, and if you want to spend a bunch of money you can go, but the 3d t.v. action was horrendous. Thank heavens we didn't spend to much of our time wasting it on this show, dvr's don't fail us now... This brings to mind how important our alone time really is, I just love the hell out of my woman, there's just not enough time in the day to enjoy being with her. We get caught up in such trivial worries (like how we are going to pay the light bill, pay for gas, or if the earth is going to still be here tomorrow) instead of enjoying that moment where we are just laughing, caught in the rapture of what helped us become parents. Being partners! Truly enjoying eachother's company. Now my wife might have a total different spin on tonight's misadventure, but I just enjoyed sitting with her... J

Postpartum Part 2

I couldn't agree more with Josh's blog entry about about postpartum. In a way both my wife and I have had atypical postpartum experiences which have created quite a bit of elusiveness for us. I am much more irritable and impatient with my wife than I used to be, which is exactly the opposite of how the daddy websites tell you to be. I'm uber-protective of the baby (sometimes to a fault) which leads to my being hypercritical. My wife's postpartum has manifest itself in more agro ways which (again) isn't how the websites online describe postpartum, so it was difficult obtaining the postpartum diagnosis. Now that we both know what we're dealing with, it makes it easier to take steps to correct it. What's worked for me is: Chill time to myself, meditation/self-hypnosis and lots of physical affection towards my wife, even if it seems forced. We call it "making deposits in the love bank". I didn't have the same issues bonding with the baby that Josh had, but I'm interested to hear some solutions because I know that (with daddy away at work now), bonding can become an issue in the near future. xo -t.

Baby Proof Me

I just got home from a meeting and I was informed that my baby has started to crawl. There is proof on the Flip Camera. 10 1/2 months and knees don't fail me now! I could hear my wife welling up as she recorded, and then state "we better baby proof this house". Now I have the hand me down baby proofing, but I am not a handy guy! I mean don't get me wrong I like to do stuff, but I am just not "good" at it. Growing up sans many males, it's not my strongest suit. I wasn't in a hurry for my baby to start crawling, because frankly I was enjoying being able to know where she was at all times. This is totally exciting though, it's really cool when milestones pop up, I mean this is the first time ever crawling... pretty cool stuff and technology made it so I didn't have to miss it by being in a meeting. Baby proof me. -J

Breaking the Silence

Dad's have our own form of postpartum:

There has been talk about how having a child can be very isolating and there's also a ton of information on postpartum depression for moms, but I have never heard dad's talk about what it's like for them. It's time we break the silence. My own personal experience has been interesting. My wife and I are both out of work. In some ways it's been a fortunate thing, since we get to spend time with our baby, in these first few years of life. Yet as a new dad, I have experienced some fear and longing. I am currently taking a strong look at my dreams and considering changing my plans in order to create a safe environment for my family. Also, if your wife is breast feeding, which mine is, there's a really cool bond that takes place between her and this new spirit hanging out at my house. At first I felt really left out. And I am a real present father. I know how to create other ways to bond. I was a big fan of skin on skin hanging out. Changing diapers. I take baths with my baby so that we can have "our" time. We take walks, we play. It's awesome. I feel it's important to be conscious of the fact that we as Dad's are dealing with the transition as well, in our own way. Some dad's go crazy with making MONEY in order to compensate for their fear, other dad's get extremely protective, and I have heard couples have a real hard time regaining their former relationships. Regardless of what your position is on this, Dad's have feelings too. I am a "new dad", I have never been a dad before, I have never been at this place, with these people, in this situation right now, before. So sometimes there are emotions that are hard to define, reactions that come out of nowhere, and times where we feel overwhelmed for whatever reason too. Granted, the mom's experience is unique, it's amazing, but we do have something to do with it. It took us together, and currently you aren't parenting alone. I feel very fortunate that my wife is who she is, and that she does her best, and there's a new found sexy watching your wife become a mom, and witnessing this very cool part of her emerge, I respect her more than I ever could have imagined. No book prepared me, and my feelings change by the hour, they have this beginning middle and end, and they pass. But I am having feelings. Maybe postpartum is not the right term, but dad's have feelings too.

New Episodes Online Now!

We've just launched the first two episodes of TWO NEW DADS! Check them both out at www.TwoNewDads.com -T & Josh

Man Lonely / Friend Lonely

Let me explain. So T and I are texting during the football game, I am not a football fan but it's the championships before the super bowl so I can follow... and I text, joking, about being "Man Lonely" and we digitally had a laugh. But the interesting thing is my wife and I are feeling "friend lonely". What I mean by this, is the cabin fever, isolation of being parents, and days bleeding into each other, has left us feeling like we want to "hang with friends" or do something with a friend. My interests are becoming very mundane. I can't really get into anything. I did a little watching of boxing, I did a little financial worrying, we even went to a friends party. But for some reason there's this odd lonely feeling. Any one have any thoughts on this? -J

It's 1055pm- My wife just showed me the baby montior

My baby is sleeping in a crib. OMG. I can hear it in my wife's voice, she's sad about it. But my daughter is fast asleep and looks pretty comfortable. I am in the bathroom, where else? I have mixed feelings about this too though. I love having our daughter co-sleep with us, after all she is the third party in what used to be a duo that has now become a trinity. But I had the feeling she was trying to tell us she wanted this, maybe we were too much up in her space and she just wanted time to relax. After all we are kissing on her and loving her and moving around, I mean the bed is a CAL KING, but obviously tonight is her first try, she seems content so far. Some dad's I know and their partners where all about schedule right out the gate, and I personally don't believe there truly is a right or wrong way, but for us schedules seem to accomadate the parents right off bat, so we are just trying observe the cues our baby gives us and take it one day at a time. My thought and feeling was, look they are only going to be babies for so long, I am in not hurry to get her walking and talking and sleeping by herself, she has a whole life ahead of her, I am trying to enjoy my time with her, because it's unique. I try to stay present with her and my wife and the dog for that matter. But selfishly I feel a bit mixed about this and I just saw it on the monitor five minutes ago, but I will try to keep writing about it as my feelings evolve or digress. Granted the other part of me, is like, yes, now some mommy daddy action, we get our own bed back etc etc. But I have been used to having her there and feel the three of us can be in sink with one another, more will be revealed I guess. Dads: Any feelings on this? -Josh

Heightend Awareness/Are you holding my baby too long?

I always want to know where my baby is. I trust the people that have held her, but as a new dad, I get a little over aware and protective. I just want to be able to see where my baby is, it's nothing against others, and yes I want the baby to be social, and she is, she loves people, and I don't hang with dangerous types, in fact most people that have held her I love dearly. But I am the dad, so don't be walking away with my baby out of my eye or ear range. Have you experienced this as a new dad? Any fun experiences that you are having with your new little spiritual partner? I notice when I drive with her I have like "spider sense"- I am scanning all over the place, I feel like I am some secret service agent protecting the queen. - Josh

Response to Tivo Guilt

Don't feel guilty, I tape Jeopardy, (I know, I am a closet dork, how's that for a guy who barely graduated high school, I am like a savant in some respects but not as respectable.) I also tape boxing and the lakers from time to time. I think you are a great dad! And you are my friend. I would love it if some other dads weighed in, I feel like we are just talking to eachother- hee hee...-Josh

Football Weekend w/ Baby?

Should I feel guilty about being a football fan and trying to raise a baby at the same time? Luckily my baby likes all the pretty colors and will watch football with me (in brief spurts). And luckily we have TiVo so I can pause the game, spend time with the baby and then fast-forward through the commercials so I'm not spending a solid 3+ hours watching the games. And luckily I have a wife who is supportive of my football addiction and will take the baby for a walk occasionally (which is soothing for both of them). And, hey, if I'm not in too much of a hurry, I can wait until everyone's asleep and watch whatever I didn't catch during the waking hours. And let's face it: Between the commercials, the punts/kickoffs, instant replay, coach's challenges, penalties, time between plays and halftime, the games are really only about 5 minutes long. Plenty of time to spend with baby and mommy.

The NFL Championship games are on this weekend and I'm really looking forward to them. Enjoy! -t.

Today My Daughter has top teeth coming in-

And boy is she uncomfortable. We use the natural camomile drops, which don't seem to do much, and a bit of the or-gel... She's a trooper, I do find it interesting how this really primal instinct to take away my daughters pain is overwhelmingly present. I would knock my own teeth out and put in new baby teeth to take it away from her... (Hi. crazy person.) It's effecting her sleep, which in turn effects our sleep (since we all co-sleep)... But she is a riot at night, she's just funny, she nose dives into pillows and mommy's breast, she laughs, she talks... My baby girl isn't walking or crawling yet, she's more of a scooter... She is learning the artful way to get what she wants. It's an amazing journey and I love watching her watch things... I turned to my wife late last night and said, I can't believe we didn't have her "sooner". Alot of people say, well "when we are ready, we will try". I gotta tell ya, my experience is you are never "ready". Hell, I don't even know where the next paycheck is going to come from, but being a dad is the best thing that has ever happened to me, hands down, no words, no blogg, nothing could ever prepare you for the wonder, and mind blowing ride you will be thrust upon.... Yikes... Share please someone post, our goal is 5 million hits. All dads unite, moms we need you too, shout it from the roof tops, tell a friend, tell "jen's list" to check us out, anything. Much Love- J

In response to my buddy T regarding iron supplements

Thats totally interesting, we haven't been told that. There is so much information out there. As some of you may know my wife is a closet hippie, so supplements haven't been too big on the menu. She does take some elixir that is supposed to help with the baby's devoloping BRAIN, and she takes this hemp seed (looks like grains) that she puts on her food that is supposed to help in some way too. And no, not that kind of hemp seed. Part me thinks T, your baby is going to be just fine, but as far as suggestions, I am clueless, and stil mezmorized by my daughter starting to cry if I leave the room (very rad). What sort of other things do you dads hear about regarding supplements and do's and don'ts? Josh (the other dad of TWO NEW DADS)

Polyvisol anyone?

Our pediatrician suggested we use Polyvisol as an iron supplement so our baby doesn't become anemic (apparently breast milk is low in iron). Initially we had trouble mixing it in with rice cereal because it changed the taste and she didn't want to eat it, so we've been giving it to her directly from the dropper into her mouth which, as you can imagine, she doesn't like either. We've had a couple of incidents where we've gotten it in her eyes because she squirms so much in resistance. Very dramatic. Now that she's eating more, I've proposed putting the Polyvisol in her food again since it will be more diluted. But we're also supplementing with 1 bottle of formula every day (Enfamil) which has iron in it. So do we even need to keep giving her Polyvisol? How important is it? I've heard there's also a danger of iron poisoning if you give a baby too much iron. We were going to ask our pediatrician at the next visit, but in the meantime, I figured I'd put it out there and see what people think. Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated. Thanks!
-t.